My Beach Place

The Girl 4

2007-02-02T13:54:00.000-05:00

go to the beginning of the story

Waking up Not Dead…

“Freight train, each car looks the same”. Distantly, foggily, weirdly the song permeated her brain. She couldn’t move, couldn’t see and felt sick to her stomach. Gradually, her senses awoke. Ann slowly lifted her head from the arm of the couch and moved her left leg. This movement created a loud clanging sound that sent Sam running to the kitchen for cover. Seems that the eleven beer bottles, perched precariously on the coffee table, had crashed to the floor. Still groggy, Annie sat up straight, rubbed her eyes and tried to focus. It did not work. She was absolutely unable to figure out the whole scene. “Did I have a party?” she thought. Just then, like a bullet, it hit her. “I am not dead”, she surmised. “Holy shit!” she said aloud.

Standing was a horrible idea. For it produced enough change in her equilibrium, that she projectile vomited across the living room. The smell was rancid. A combination of beer and garlic (most likely from her shrimp scampi the day before) and wine (OK, so she had one glass to set the mood of death) and aspirin filled the room. The smell of the puke made her heave again. The carpet was taking a beating. After the second spell had subsided, she ran to the bathroom, got naked and jumped in the shower. Gently, she turned the knob to left the cold stinging water became tepid, then warm and finally, hot. Ann held the glass shower door for balance, moved forward and dunked her head under the steaming waterfall. She would remain there for forty-five minutes.

After the immersion, there were no more puking spells. Her stomach muscles ache from all the contractions, but the empty chamber settled down. Ironically, however, she had a massive headache. It was ironic to her because she had swallowed an entire bottle of aspirin. “What do you take for a headache brought on by aspirin?” she mused. The smile actually hurt. Making her way back to the kitchen for a glass of water, the scene of the episode was a wreck. Sam was smart enough to remain in the kitchen near her food and water bowls. She knew her owner was in trouble, so she arose to meet Annie, whom now had only a towel on for clothing. Sam licked Ann’s still wet leg, and pushed her nose under her hand. “Hey you”, Annie said.

Ann pushed the glass under the ice machine in the door of the freezer and filled a huge glass with ice and water. She took a long, slow sip of the liquid. She could not remember any time in her life that anything tasted as good as that water. She opened the latch on the back door and strolled out on the patio. It was cold in the New York morning air. She rested on a chair whose cushion had been stored for the winter. Form the patio she could see the park several lots away. There was a small child being pushed on a swing by a man. “My life can never be that simple again”, she thought. Her strength returning, she made a vow to herself. No matter how fucked up and sad her life gets, she would never try to end it again. The man and little girl were hugging. Annie felt a tear on her cheek and realized she had been crying. Just then, Sam put her paws in Ann’s lap. Their hug made Ann’s heart feel better.

Song of the Day: Better Days, by Bruce Springsteen

The Girl 3

2007-02-01T23:51:00.000-05:00

go to the beginning of the story

Waffles…

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day; right after dinner and lunch. Always a colossal conundrum deciding what to eat. Today is easy. It’s Monday. It’s waffle day. Not that she ever eats waffles anymore, but hell, it’s waffle day. What this means is that Ann makes waffles. Eight waffles to be exact. You see, four waffles are required for breakfast and four will be frozen for ice cream sandwiches after dinner. This was their routine.

God she misses making waffles with Ryan. He was such a great cook. He never measured any ingredient, but the result was always perfection. Conversely, no matter how meticulously she adhered to the directions, Ann’s waffles were basically Frisbees, suitable only for her dog, Sam. Sam is a whole different story. Suffice to say, she has her own host of issues.

After learning of Ryan’s death, Annie was dangerous. She considered suicide on many occasions. The most successful un-success was the aspirin episode. Not being a big fan of blood, self-mutilation and a fear of sharp objects, slitting her wrists was not an option. She also abhorred guns, so no luck there. Then she read on a website that you could actually kill yourself if you took enough aspirin. Perfect. Ann was in the abyss and this was her only way out.

She wanted to do it right. So she put on her favorite music, The Allman Brothers Band, got comfortable in jeans, a t-shirt and flip flops. Grabbed a 12 pack of her favorite beer, Yuengling, and placed in a cooler next to her couch. The website indicated that she would basically fall asleep at some point. If she was going to fall asleep anyway, she figured she should go out drunk on last time. For some reason, thinking back about that today makes her chuckle.

“OK, let’s do this”, she said, and opened beer number one. Just then, as if on cue, One Way Out came through the speakers. Annie smiled.

To be continued…

Song of the Day: One Way Out, by Allman Brothers Band

The Girl 2

2007-01-31T04:23:00.000-05:00

go to the beginning of the story

"Good enough..."

Having dressed in her favorite funky, professional pants, her brown leather boots and brown cashmere sweater, she looked toward her jewelry box. This was her favorite part of the day. She loved all her jewelry and truly felt naked when she did not have it on. Many of her pieces she had purchased throughout the years, some were gifts and some were bequeathed to her from favorite Aunts, etc.

Today was a silver day she decided. In keeping with the funky mood, she chose 2 inch, hoop earrings. She loved to turn here head back and forth and feel them on her neck. A thin-chained silver necklace with a single teardrop shape made her smile. “I look good”, she thought. Of all things in the jewelry box, she treasured her rings the most. Each one had a story and that memory made each day she wore it special. After several minutes of debate, she decided that one ring for her forefinger is all she desired. The choice was simple, Aunt Bridget’s silver and opal ring.

As she slipped the ring into position, she sat back on her dressing room chair and was lost in a thought. The last time she had seen her Aunt was 10 years ago. It was summer and, as she did since she could remember, she was spending it at music camp. The camp was located in Pennsylvania, not far from her Aunt’s cabin. The highlight of her two months at camp was the last day. For on that day, crazy Aunt Bridget would pick her up, they would go back to the cabin and the weekend was spent with just the two of them. The two days of girl talk, cooking, reading, painting and hiking were the best of her summer. She dreaded the next week that she would need to go home and be dull little Annie again.

Ann kissed the ring, got up and looked again in the mirror. “Good enough”, she sighed.

To be continued…

Song of the Day: Misty Mountain Hop, by Led Zeppelin

The Girl

2007-01-30T10:18:00.000-05:00

God I wish her well…

OK, not exactly the most upbeat of stories, but I saw this girl today. She was just so brilliant; a true presence on the Number 4 subway train. She stood by the doors, facing inward. She would only open her eyes at the station stops. Otherwise, she looked as if she could be dead; eyes closed, lips pursed and skin as ashen as I have ever seen. She was the highlight of my day, my week, perhaps even my pathetic month. I do not know her true story, but here is what I imagined it to be…

She woke up; at 6:03 AM, as always. She wakes up at 6:03 AM to remind her of the day her life changed forever. That was the exact time that she received the call that her boyfriend had died in a plane crash over Italy. Actually, the time in the US was 1:03 AM, but he traveled so often that the time conversion was instant in her head. It’s been 2 years, one month and four days since the call. Still, she misses him at the same time every day.

Upon waking, she removes his beat up Fordham t-shirt and gets in the shower. She has no meetings today, so pants are on option. That being the case, shaving her legs will not happen. She wonders when she started brushing her teeth in the shower. She used to do it at the sink. Not important enough to continue her thought, she moves on to the day ahead.

As she dries of her nearly perfect body with a sea foam green towel, she looks in the mirror. She smiles like an angel; she is beautiful. Then she cries. Just for one minute, like she does every day. She rewashes her face and moves to the next step of her well planned life. She has no idea what will happen to her in just two short hours.

To be continued…

Song of the Day: Dirty Boulevard, by Lou Reed

A Real Job

2007-01-29T16:01:00.000-05:00

I have one this week…

I am one of the minions again. For the entire week, I will be dragging my sorry ass to NY City for meetings in our office. This is not the norm for me since I have been working remotely from my home office. Actually, truth be told, I spend about half of the month in any one of our offices across the country. For example, I will be in Chicago all next week.

Anyway, as an interesting anecdote, my office looks out at 42nd Street & Madison Avenue. I am constantly amazed by the amount of people that walk by all day long. Do these people not work? I mean, there are millions of them. Young, old, fat, skinny, men and women. And kids. Hello, school? I catch myself at times just staring, making up stories for them. Maybe I’ll share a couple this week.

Happy Monday, everyone! I’m hard at work at my real job…

Song of the Day: Drive My Car, by The Beatles

The Friday 5, 15 or 50...Depends on My Mood

2007-01-26T15:20:00.000-05:00

People that think, and the reason for my admiration...

!) Eninstien, e=mc2
2) Johnadam, being my friend
3) Jack Welch, Hello- GE
4) My boss, I am not fired...yet
5) Eminem, 8 Mile (just watch it)

Life is thinkable...

Song of the day: War Pigs, by Ozzy

Women Hate Me

2007-01-25T23:43:00.000-05:00

A fact, not an observation...

In the lost minutes, he sees years, not days.

He knows...

Song of the day: We Belong, by Pat Benatar

OK, OK, New York City is Cool

2007-01-24T22:28:00.000-05:00

If you live long enough…

Sometimes, things sneak up on you. Like the dude whose girl you’re snaking (accidentally). Or the expired milk you drank last night. You get the point. Anyway, my present working arrangement allows me to work from my home office. Yes, I live at the beach, so the days and the views are not so bad. I plug away all day in my Nike sneakers, torn shorts and my “It’s all about me” t-shirt. I get paid to think, not look good…

To the point; I commuted to “the city” today and the energy was palpable. I stepped off the ferry – yes, the $200 a week ferry – and my first footstep reminded me of why I have made this crazy commute for 15 years (yes, I began working when I was 5). Not to bring down the mood in this inspiring post, but I was downtown on 9/11. I was scared, pissed, scared, confused, and finally relieved to get off the island. That relief was the opposite today as I wanted nothing more than to get on the island. I cannot do it every day because some has to feed my cat, but I’ll do it more after my experience today. I promise…

Crap, I hate when I’m wrong.

Song of the day: In The City, by Eagles

State Of My Union

2007-01-23T17:59:00.000-05:00

Hint: It's not good...

Like many of you, I am tired of our current direction on many things:

Iraq
The environment
Health care

Oh, you know the deal. I have a daughter. It's her world more than mine. I want more for her.

Bring on the candidates!

Song of the day: Piss It All Away, by Puddle of Mudd

Blue Monday

2007-01-22T14:39:00.000-05:00

Now it all makes sense...

I read today that this Monday of the year is known as Blue Monday. It seems that our lack of ability to repay our Christmas debt, need for a vacation, the weather and New Years' resolutions not realized all contribute. Let me say that I, for one, am convinced.

But today, contrary to my actions in years' past, I am in a good mood. The weather sucks, I have no money (relatively), I need a vacation (which I will get in February), I have been going to the gym. 50/50? I'll take it!

The doctor in the article suggested that we can do something to cheer our fellow humans up. OK, here goes...you look mahhhvelous!!

Song of the day: Turn to Stone, by Electric Light Orchestra

The Friday 5, 15 or 50...Depends on My Mood

2007-01-19T10:42:00.000-05:00

Things that...

...smell good to me

1) Very Sexy 2 - for Women (another secret of Victoria's)
2) Sea air
3) Steak Fajitas
4) Fresh beer
5) My daughter after a long day in the summer sun

Let's stop there for now. After all, I'm just getting the old feet wet again. Speaking of that...snow blows!

Happy weekend, all.

Song of the day: Little Miss Magic, by Buffett

I See Dead People

2007-01-18T13:17:00.000-05:00

Funny How Life Works...

So, yesterday was the 10th anniversary of my Father's death. I was surprised how much it affected me. Don't get me wrong, I miss the guy more than anything, and would trade many and much to have him look at me again. It's just that as days, and months, and years go by, life allows your hurt to mellow from irreparable to manageable.

Yesterday was tough.

Anyway, it got me thinking of what would make me feel better. So, I went to the cemetery, got drunk, made a list and fell down. Today I read the list and it said, among other ramblings, (barely legible) "blog again". OK, here I am, blogging. Feel better? Slightly.

Love you Dad...

Song of the day: Daddy's Hands, by Holly Dunn

Hi, Again

2006-07-09T01:00:00.000-04:00

Shit storms are extremely indiscriminate...

Thank you.

If you said anything. And thank you if you said nothing. My blogging friends mean the world to me; truth be told, they always will. OK, so here is what happen - the order is as irrelevant as is my current disdain for life...

Moose looses his job (fuck)
Dad's sister (Aunt Geraldine - Ger) dies
Mom has full-blown emphysema
I am still a clueless observer

OK, fuck again. I am not a whiner, but can these people get a fucking break? I was a Pall Bearer at my Aunt's funeral. Honored.

Going to sleep. Fuck it.

I love you all, and really, thanks for the prodding to get me back (sort of).

Song of the day: In the Lap of the Gods, by Queen

Dancing Machine

2006-06-11T14:51:00.000-04:00

Me, dancing with some hotties in Bahamas...

Song of the day: Dancing Queen, by ABBA

A Fish Story

2006-06-10T12:05:00.000-04:00

Me, fishing the Jersey Shore for Blues...

Song of the day: If I Could, by Phish

The Friday 5, 15 or 50...Depends on My Mood

2006-06-09T13:39:00.000-04:00

Things that...

...should not happen during the summer

Rain
School
Acne
Monogamy
Reality TV (actually, this should never happen)

I got engaged to my girlfriend, Karen Lyn, last night (remarkably, she said yes) and I am too excited to blog. Enjoy the weekend, kiddies!

And KL, I love you...

Song of the day: Diamond As Big As The Ritz, by Buffett

Weather Blows

2006-06-08T08:35:00.000-04:00

WTF?

OK, I've been patient long enough. If I don't get some sun really soon, heads will roll. Honestly, I am not a violent man by nature, but give me a break. It's June f-ing 8th and it's cold, wet and damp! I want to be sweating in my short sleeve shirt, not wondering if I need a wind, or even rain, jacket every morning.

As a protest to this weather, I am going to LA next week for a few days. There take that!

Sorry, I am a little belligerent today. Carry on...

Song of the day: Waiting For The Sun, by The Doors

Anticipation

2006-06-07T08:36:00.000-04:00

I'm like a kid on Christmas Eve...

So here's the deal, my buddy JAH will be in the city this evening. We will be getting together for some beers and conversation. To say that I am excited would be a dramatic understatement. I know shit happens, and the whole thing might not actually work out, but that would really suck. It has been weeks since we have had one of our imbibing sessions, and I need one!

Topics will range from the important to the ludicrous (not the rapper), but it will all be the funnest things ever. We are meeting at the house of worship that is Tracks. That, in and of itself, presents many challenges, but, as a very wise man once said, "we shall overcome".

Can't wait to see you, man...

Song of the day: Don't Call Me Up, by Mick Jagger

A Long Walk

2006-06-06T09:15:00.000-04:00

I'm sweating my ass off...

Because I am trying to get in better shape, I have been looking for cardio exercise any place that I can. My normal commute has me take a ferry from NJ to Manhattan each day. The ferry is great because, unlike driving, it affords me the time to read the paper, etc. In the evening, it also affords me the time to have a couple of beers, but I digress. Anyway, the ferry drops me at the foot of Wall Street (downtown). I then walk two blocks to the subway, and take that, literally, under my building in midtown.

The ferry also makes a stop in midtown on the east side of the island. I have always thought the walk was too far for the winter months, but with the nicer weather and my physical fitness push, today I gave it a try. I walked from the FDR drive at 34th Street to Madison and 42nd Street. For the record, I am hot and a little winded. I just did a Mapquest search and the distance is 1 mile. Yay me!

Although you probably don't care at all, I will keep you posted on my exercise exploits...

Song of the day: Time of My Life, by Eminem

A Little Slow Today

2006-06-05T21:04:00.000-04:00

OK, very slow...

It was a very long weekend. My brain is still too foggy to bloggy, so I am going to have a few more beers and go to bed. See y'all tomorrow...

Song of the day: Grapefruit - Juicy Fruit, by Jimmy Buffett

Standin' On The Corner

2006-06-04T21:48:00.000-04:00

In Winslow, Arizona...

Song of the day: Take it Easy, by The Eagles

Home is Where the Icing Is

2006-06-03T20:44:00.000-04:00

A really cool gingerbread house I made at Christmas...

Song of the day: When You Dream, by Bare Naked Ladies

The Friday 5, 15 or 50...Depends on My Mood

2006-06-02T22:31:00.000-04:00

Things that...

...are on my desk at work right now

A pink highlighter
The Wall Street Journal
A picture of my daughter
My Blackberry
Our company Business Continuity Plan

Enjoy the weekend!

Song of the day: Flinch, by Alanis Morissette

Today is the First Day of the Rest of My Life

2006-06-01T08:38:00.000-04:00

Jeez, that is one lame title...

OK, so the free weights are prepared for my workout tonight, and the bike chain is oiled. I'm as excited about this as I have been about anything in a long time. I'll provide some progress reports as warranted.

Last night I watched a show called VH1 Rock Honors. The show, well, it rocked. My favorite band of all-time is Queen (KISS, Judas Priest, and Def Leppard were also honored - all good bands). While some people don't like Queen, and I can dig that, I love this band. The music is so rich and loud and complex. The words to the songs have always spoken to me as well. Probably my favorite song by the band is below, in the "Song of the day" section of the blog. The way I feel today makes the song true for me again, just as it did when I was 13 years old...

"He knew it was time, he'd made up his mind, to leave his dead life behind"...

Thank you Freddie, John, Brian and Roger. You are my friends and I love you for the peace you bring to my aging, aching soul.

Song of the day: Spread Your Wings, by Queen

June, Already?

2006-05-31T08:32:00.000-04:00

Where did five months go...?

As I sit here on the cusp of June, I realize that most of the things I wanted to get done this year are largely not. OK, you heard it here first, tomorrow is the day I moved to action. First up, dedication to a formal workout schedule.

I'll keep you posted. Enjoy the final day of May...

Song of the day: Sister Golden Hair, by America

I Hate Weed Wackers

2006-05-30T11:12:00.000-04:00

There ought to be a law...

So I'm hanging out, on my deck. Nothing new here, but I am disturbed and I'm not sure why. Let's run through the checklist; sun...check, comfy chair...check, music...check, beer...double check, peace and quiet...fuck no! There must be 20 goddamn weed wackers going. Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz, snip, hit a rock, bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Shut the things off!! Jeez...

Song of the day: The Sounds of Silence, by Simon & Garfunkel

Memorial Day Madness

2006-05-29T22:42:00.000-04:00

It always the unplanned parties that rock...

Innocuously enough, I invited my cousin to stop by my house on his way to the bar. I was actually supposed to go to the bar with him, but I was a mess from the festivities the night before, and was finding it difficult to focus on much more the my deck chair and my beer. Moments after speaking to Casey - my cousin - my brother-in-law calls and says he's coming over and I can't stop him. Problem, BIG problem.

Before they arrive, my girlfriend - Karen Lyn - asks me if I want to go see the beach. Head hurts, so sun and salt water will do me good - I go. Upon arriving back at the house, my two guests are perched on the deck, drinking Coronas and listening to my iPod. Next to them is 50 Littleneck clams that will soon be on the grill. This is going to get ugly.

I won't bore you with the details, but in summation, the party went all day and night. My sister, two nephews and another friend would show up before all was said and done. Many beers were drank, clams were eaten and sunburn was gotten.

I love summer...

Song of the day: Every Time I Look at You, by Kiss

My Sun

2006-05-28T11:49:00.000-04:00

The tattoo of the sun on my back...

Song of the day: Rain King, by Counting Crows

Man on Fire

2006-05-27T09:22:00.000-04:00

Me, by the firepit at my daughter's 10th birthday party...

Song of the day: I'm on Fire, by Bruce Springsteen

The Friday 5, 15 or 50...Depends on My Mood

2006-05-26T00:12:00.000-04:00

Things that...

...Make Summer in "the NJ" better than Winter

Sand between my toes
Golf
A distinct lack of snow
An open Tiki Bar
Half naked women in public
Open sunroof
Beach smells
Bicycle rides
Flip flops
Body surfing
Fireflies
The boardwalk
Memories of a summer long gone
Flag Day
Sunglasses

Happy Memorial Day, friends! I am outtie!!

Song of the day: Remember (Walking in the Sand), by Aerosmith

Adventures in Grilling

2006-05-25T08:34:00.000-04:00

A man and his lighter fluid are not to be messed with...

So I bought a charcoal grill this spring. I had previously used propane, but it was time to go "old school". The weather has been really crappy, with rain and coldness, so I have only used the grill three times. One of those times was last night and man, did I nail it!

The menu was simple brilliance; corn on the cob, chicken breast and London broil. I also made sauteed spinach, but that has nothing to do with the grilling experience here. The chicken breast was marinated all day in a Worcestershire sauce. And the London broil in an red wine and oil & vinegar sauce. Yummy. I do not boil my corn; rather, I wrap it in foil and cook it solely on the grill. Double yummy.

Anyway, the point here is that I have mastered the art of the charcoal brickette pyramid to start the blaze. Generous squirts of lighter fluid make for an even, consistent burn. After a 30 wait, I disperse the brickettes along the bottom rack. Ten more minutes and it's time for the food. The key to grilling the chicken is to flip it periodically. This is an absolute no no for meat. So I need to have the patience of a saint, but the eye of a hawk. When conditions are perfect, flip the meat for the only time. Last night, a bull's eye!

As I set the London broil aside (you should do this fro 5 to 10 minutes before you eat), the red juices began to seep. "This could be good", I said knowingly to myself. Upon slicing said beef, I was proven right. Oh the beauty of it. And the taste!

Not sure why I told you that, but whatever...Golf tomorrow!

Song of the day: Ba Bump, by Black Eyed Peas

My Beer & Me

2006-05-24T11:18:00.000-04:00

I knew it all the time...

You Are Bud Light

You're not fussy when it comes to beer. If someone hands it to you, you'll drink it.
In fact, you don't understand beer snobbery at all. It all tastes the same once you're drunk!
You're an enthusiastic drinker, and you can often be found at your neighborhood bar.
You're pretty good at holding your liquor too - you've had lots of experience.

What's Your Beer Personality?

Not much more needs to be said. Actually, taking the quiz made me thirsty. I'm going to have a few right now. See you tomorrow.

BTW - I'm playing golf on Friday and getting drunk all weekend at the Tiki Bar. Tuesday will certainly be a disaster...

Song of the day: Here Comes My Girl, by Tom Petty

New Adventures of Old Jeremiah

2006-05-23T10:06:00.000-04:00

Not as good as the old adventures...

Last night, I watched TV. I do that sometimes. Anyway, I watched the show with the ex-Seinfeld lady. It's a pretty good show and it makes me laugh. Part of the reason that I enjoy it is that I can relate. I am divorced, and in the early stages, my ex and I spent a lot of time together. We exchanged birthday and Christmas presents, etc. Jesus, for my daughter's fifth birthday, we all took a trip to Disney World. Scary!

The thing about the show that cracks me up is that the ex-husband meets a girl (considerably younger) with the same name, Christine. I had a similar, not exact, experience with a girl I dated for a time after my divorce. Here's the deal: My ex's first name has six letters, so did new girlfriend. Ex's middle name; Marie, same as new girlfriend. Ex's last name ended in "nski", new girlfriend's did too. Ex born in Brooklyn, NY, same as new girlfriend. Ex is a Taurus, same as new girlfriend. And the kicker, ex's birthday is May 9th. You guessed it, same as new girlfriend!

Well, things didn't work out any better for new girlfriend and we parted ways years ago. I have since found true love. She has actually guest-blogged on this site before. She is younger than me, but we are good for each other. Best part is, she has nothing in common with ex...

Song of the day: Ours, by Sugar Ray

My First Day in The New World Order

2006-05-22T08:56:00.000-04:00

This sucks...

So here we are. Some of my recent posts (here and here) have been about my friend (best friend) JAH leaving his job in NY city to pursue another career path. This new path is taking him to Long Island - Garden City to be exact. Now Garden City to mid-town Manhattan can be done in 30 minutes via train, but that is hardly the point. The point is that he and I spent a lot of time together. He taught me so much. Our meetings after work were legendary. I will miss them, and him, dearly.

I sit here today at my desk feeling different and empty. I will be fine, of course, but I am taking my one day grace period to be a sissy and mourn the loss of my playmate. I'm going to get to work now and keep myself busy until the dreaded lunch hour. What will I do? Where will I go? Is it possible that I am actually a bit scared?

Jeez, I am a knucklehead...

Song of the day: I Don't Like Mondays, by Boomtown Rats

A Goat Sit-In

2006-05-21T17:50:00.000-04:00

At the Los Angeles Zoo, Burbank, CA...

Song of the day: Bad Day, by Daniel Powter (idea stolen unabashedly from Megan)

Angels Around Us

2006-05-20T20:48:00.000-04:00

The ceiling of a gazebo, Punta Cana, Dominican Republic...

Song of the day: Bad Day, by Fuel (idea stolen unabashedly from Megan)

The Friday 5, 15 or 50...Depends on My Mood

2006-05-19T17:49:00.000-04:00

Things that...

...I dig today

Short shorts
A firm hand shake
Unusually, no hole for myself
Two birdies in row (for the 1st time ever)
Appreciation of my prose

Song of the day: "The Pastoral" 6th Symphony, by Beethoven (idea stolen unabashedly from Megan)

Dreamer

2006-05-18T08:25:00.000-04:00

I had another one of those nights...

As I have blogged before, I am prone to crazy dreams that keep me up at night. They are kind of fun at the time, because their entertainment value is usually very high. Problem is, I am dead tired in the morning. It is that kind of morning today. Bring on the coffee!

Anyway, back to the dream. Generally speaking, I am the main character in my dreams. Last night however, I was upstaged by my loving cat, Sushi. The basic premise of the dream was that Sushi was lost (or hiding). The search for her took me to some exotic and weird places; and I met some interesting people as well.

The journey started mundanely enough in my house; which is small so the search was brief - futile, but brief. Walk out the door and I find myself at my Grandmother's house. Seeing her was a treat, since she has been dead for 2 years. Anyway, I go into the basement (which I loathe) to search for the very important feline. Well, of course, she is not there. But it was a treat to see my Dad, since he's been dead for almost 10 years. He looks good.

Exiting the scary basement door should have left me in the small city-type backyard. Do you think I got that lucky? No. I was now in the living room of my grade school friend, Bob Maxwell - Max. There was a grade school party going on, of course, but no one seemed to recognize the 40 year old lunatic from the future looking for his cat. Well I recognized them, including Debbie Fallon, the beautiful and elegant 13 year old Debbie Fallon. After a short, but inspirational make-out session, I got back to the business of pet detective. Sushi was not here either. Could have knocked me over with a feather.

Out Max's side door should have led me to the basketball court in the driveway. Chances of that happening - exactly 0%. No, I was now in a hotel in Boston, MA. I used to go there for business and once was accompanied by an incredible woman that I truly believe was my soul mate. Let's call her Diane. I haven't seen Diane in a while, but she's still smokin'. Evidently I looked OK too based upon the greeting kiss I received. Imagine her surprise when we ran into her brother at the pool. He, too, looked great. Especially if you consider he has been dead for 15 years. Anyway, the cat did not travel to Boston either, so the search had to continue. Since this was my f-ing dream, I wanted Diane to come with me. Sadly, as it happened in real life, she just faded away.

Leaving the front of the Hilton should have been a cab stand. Survey says...no cab stand! Just a cemetery. I thought this was a weird thing because all the people in the cemeteries seemed to be walking the earth again. Anyway, it was the grave of a dearly departed ex-girlfriend from high school. I wanted so bad to see her, but she never pulled the Houdini like the rest of the zombies. I waited a few minutes, then sat, then slept. I awoke to a curious moisture on my cheek. Yep, you guessed it, I was in bed with the cat. I really need to get a life...

Song of the day: Vera, by Pink Floyd (idea stolen unabashedly from Megan)

Tracks

2006-05-17T12:23:00.000-04:00

My solemn place...

Did you ever find a spot that just feels right every time? Well I have. It's a bar in New York City - Pennsylvania Station to be exact. I do not know why, but I love going there. It makes very little sense that a place with such a transient clientele would give me a warm and fuzzy feeling each time, but it does.

I think there are a couple of factors that I can point to, but I truly believe that the allure is somehow beyond reasonable thought. That is, OK, religious. Yes, religious. I know, "Jeremiah you are a blasphemous knucklehead!" But sincerely, I feel almost holy when I am in the cathedral that is Tracks.

I mean, look at the "facts":

Alter: 2nd longest wooden bar in Manhattan
Preist: Caroline (and Susan, but she's a story for another day)
Eucharist: Bud Light
Hymns: An awesome jukebox
Confessional: See above (Caroline)
Word of the Lord: Would you like two more Bud Lights?

OK, I'm going to hell. I'll meet you there...

Song of the day: Walk a Thin Line, by Fleetwood Mac (idea stolen unabashedly from Megan)

An Obligation To Do Right

2006-05-16T08:27:00.000-04:00

Sometimes, you just have to have faith...

Merriam-Webster Online defines conscience as follows:

1a: the sense or consciousness of the moral goodness or blameworthiness of one's own conduct, intentions, or character together with a feeling of obligation to do right or be good

We can only hope that our President is acting within the framework of his. Last night, President Bush said a number of things, and I generally agreed with most. But what struck me again about this man is that he truly seems to believe what he is saying. To be sure, this President has his detractors, and the polls have not been good to him. But when he speaks the way he did last evening, I cannot help but have hope for this great nation.

It is the first morning in a while that I feel proud of the Leader of the United States of America. Just thought I'd mention that.

Song of the day: Kid Gloves, by Rush (idea stolen unabashedly from Megan)

Let's Hope Tuesday is Better

2006-05-15T11:25:00.000-04:00

All sorts of bad stuff today...

It's Monday
It's raining
It's cold
I had blood drawn
It's Monday
West Wing is really over
No playmates for lunch
I have a sore throat
Friday golf is in jeopardy
Major TV conflict tonight

That is all. See you tomorrow...

Song of the day: Bodhisattva, by Steely Dan (idea stolen unabashedly from Megan)

A West Coast Perspective

2006-05-14T20:08:00.000-04:00

The sun also sets - in California...

My Body is NOT a Temple

2006-05-13T19:59:00.000-04:00

But this is one cool church in Santa Fe, NM...

Photo Challenge

2006-05-12T23:30:00.000-04:00

OK, there is one thing you need to know: I cannot let any challenge go by without an effort. Not to say that I ever win, or even come close to winning, but fuck if I don't try. Here are my 5 entries for the inaugural "Ethel Picture Whatever". Since I suck at all things bloggish, the pictures will come first and their descriptions are below. Sorry. Well, not really. My theme for the week is stuff in New York City (where I work each day). So, again, whatever...

Wild = The way the moon looks when I am half drunk on the ferry coming home
Lonely = How I feel waiting for my ferry, staring at three of the most impressive structures of our time
Yellow = Yes, cabs. Bonus points for; the school bus, umbrella and the dude in the rain coat
Power = Where trillions of dollars are played with each day
Speed = The wind, and its impact on the greatest symbol of freedom and civility

I'm done. Is there a prize or something for last place?

The Friday 5, 15 or 50...Depends on My Mood

2006-05-12T08:17:00.000-04:00

Things that...

...I am passionate about (randomly, of course)

Beer
The West Wing (TV)
Poetry
Grilling
My Playboy subscription
Whiffle® Ball
My iPod
Jimmy Buffett
Beaches
Women
Columbo (TV)
My daughter
Golf
My bicycle
Karen Lyn (the GF)
My blog
The Wall Street Journal
Croquet
Children’s smiles
Music
Love
Work (90% of the time)
My family (knuckleheads that they are)
JAH
Queen
Ocean swimming
Politics
Shorts
September 11th
Winning
Missing California
US history
Seafood
Good sex
Sunshine
Laughter
Bow ties
Illusions (book)
Our troops, and their safety
Darts
T-shirts
Good grammar
Candles
Massages
Sun glasses
Silver jewelry
Silk ties
Abraham Lincoln
Mourning my Dad
Building anything

The Day the World Changed Forever

2006-05-11T09:05:00.000-04:00

Probably not what you think...

You see, today is my daughter's birthday. I write about her and me alot, so I don't need to make a big deal about her today. I do think; however, some stuff should be said. As I thought about what I might blog about, one thought kept creeping back. It turns out that I have created an inordinate amount of nicknames for this 10 year old person. So, in the spirit of community, I will share them with you today:

Ers
EVT
Smackle
Kiddo
Nut Job
Piglet
Jo Mama
Slick
Cindy or Debbie
Wacko
Blue Eyes
Angel
Cupcake
Killer
Swing Junkie
Erininski
Low Ears
Freckle Foot
Smartie Pants
Video Head
Yatzee Queen
Sleeping Beauty
Idol Addict
Skinny Butt
and...
Love of My Life

Happy birthday, Erin. The world is better because you are here!

Love,
Daddy

A Strange Poem I Wrote

2006-05-10T08:39:00.000-04:00

The Girl

Standing in the room alone,
I wait for her to enter.

Never been so scared before,
my world has lost its center.

The reasons for my visit here,
are mine and mine to keep.

Perhaps her touch, and gentle voice,
will pull me from the deep.

Tick tock I hear so faintly,
as if a distant echo.

Time is marching briskly,
thinking maybe I'll just let go.

The door swings slowly, shadows grow,
eyes so full of giving.

A hug, a kiss, our hands together,
I can now continue living...

Some "Old" Writings About My Daughter

2006-05-09T11:53:00.000-04:00

Beautiful and smart...

...and can she dance. Arms flail and legs kick. Faces turn red and the room suffers from cataclysmic response. But hey, it’s just dancing, right? Erin’s dancing resembles (in many ways) a rain dance which prolongs a drought. The kid has the rhythm of a steamroller. I am her mentor. The concept of moving your body to music is lost on me. Music is to be savored, right? Not unlike a fine wine or a succulent flower. Truth is, I dance like the robot from “Lost in Space”. So this Erin kid is all that and more.

She exudes the light of a million rainbows and resonates with the sound of every vast echo known to mankind. I love her. No, I worship her. Her eyes are portals to the place I long to be. She brings me there each morning that she wakes me up by prying my eyes apart with her delicate fingers. Her soft morning breath, how sweet it is, on my aging face. Our noses separated by mere centimeters. The blueness of her cornea astonishes me and transports me beside her to the wonderland of her. “Helllooo”, she says with a chortle. I am awake (and alive)!

Got Snails?

2006-05-08T08:26:00.000-04:00

I am sure I have mentioned these two things before; 1) I have a beautiful daughter, Erin and 2) I live at the beach. Well, if I haven't, then there you have it. Anyway, I love it when those two things get together. You see, I am divorced, and share joint custody of Erin with the ex. What that translates to is that I have her every other weekend for the entire weekend. She has her own room at the house and enjoys the beach as much as I do. With the weather getting marginally better (I am still not 100% pleased with the temperature), we will spend a great deal of our weekends on the sand.

So this weekend we took of on an adventure. You see, there are basically four types of beach visits:

The Sun Worshiper - all you need is a chair, a book and an iPod (and a cooler of Bud Light)
The Swimmer - all you need is your most comfortable bathing suit and some stamina (and a cooler of Bud Light)
The Adventure - all you need is a shovel, a pail, a large net, a small net and a small, curious child (with the child in tow, the BL becomes optional equipment)
The Beach Day (A combination of all the above) - all you need is EVERYTHING!

Where was I? Oh yes, the adventure. With our expedition gear at the ready, we combed the beach for all things "oceanic". I guess if we were looking for one thing more than any other, it would be fish. We want to catch a fish or two and put them in a tank in the house. As it turns out; however, no fish would be found. But you can always count on the great shoreline to provide something truly amazing - Saturday was no exception.

As we waded in the water, we saw underfoot a million little, black rocks. After a few minutes, my companion scooped up a bunch in the little net. As we sifted them, we realized that they were not rocks at all, but little snails. They were all alive and some were as big as dimes, others quarters. Having come up empty with the fish, we decided to keep 2 of the bigger, healthy ones as "pets". We scooped some sand, added a nice rock for climbing and provided some fresh sea kelp. The container is a little small, but should work for now. On the deck later that night, Erin named them Bob and Jim. She informed me that Jim was the more "active" of the two snails, so I can tell them apart when she is not there.

There you have it, I have "got snails"...

Crouching Tiger, Sleeping Cat

2006-05-07T22:22:00.000-04:00

My cat, Sushi, taking a snooze on the sill...

Table for Four

2006-05-06T20:19:00.000-04:00

My new patio set, on my old deck (there's actually 2 more chairs)...

The Friday 5, 15 or 50...Depends on My Mood

2006-05-05T09:56:00.000-04:00

Things that...

...Ethel is to this world

Humor (coy as it is)
Intelligence (fairly obvious)
Grammar (impeccable)
Pictures (and their clever little titles)
Format changes (by democracy…NOT!)
The mystique of Ethel vs. Amy (how will it end, a la “The Truman Show”)
The “Dude” chronicles (true like? No, I’m thinking the other “L”)
Links to other cool blogs (my new friends)
General Kickassness (Sirius Radio)
Inspirational workout stories (loved “Skinny Bitches” & “No Legs Guy”)
Audioblogs (such a Chicago accent)
Harry Connick Jr. references (I agree)
Pictures (OK, said it twice, they’re that good)
Dropping 30 (probably really pretty pounds)
Giving my blog a “read” once in a while

Happy Birthday, Amy. You are a treasure…

Movies In My Sleep

2006-05-04T08:33:00.000-04:00

Not very rested, but happy to be here...

A while ago, I posted about having some trouble getting a good night's sleep (Bad Dreams). I promised that if I had a really funky one, I would share. Well, last night I had a doozy.

It began innocuously enough, me alone in my car - a Kia Sorento by the way. So anyway, I'm driving down the Garden State Parkway (in NJ), heading to the beach for the day. Again, things are great, sun is out, tunes are blaring...life is good. In the blink of an eye however, everything goes to hell. Sitting next to me screaming is Susan Lucci (the soap star). Turns out she lost her Emmy, again. She begged me to drive here to California to see her agent. I, of course, acquiesced.

Upon arriving in Burbank, CA (which takes just a nanosecond in dream time), we were greeted by her agent. Imagine my surprise when her agent turns out to be my ex-wife. Things are now reeling out of control. Not only does my ex still hate me and blame me for all things wrong in the world, she has convinced Erica Kane (aka Ms. Lucci) that I am the reason for her crushing defeat at the Daytime Emmys (I never found out who did win, damnit!). Now wielding weapons, the two lunatics chase me to the lot of the studio. Now I have lived in California, and visited the studios, and this is not what they look like. The environment was that of a cave from Batman.

So I guess I make a wrong/right turn somehow, and end up on the set of the movie Fried Green Tomatoes. Don't get me wrong, I love the two chicks in that movie, and love the movie itself too. My problem now is; however, the car they are pulling form the lake is mine. Turns out I killed the bad dude. Back on the run I go. Next set please...you got it, Baywatch.

Now I never watched Baywatch, per se, but I've been seen listening to music TO Baywatch - wink, wink. Back to my plight. Turns out that Hobie is missing and I know where he might be. I must have fallen into the wrong season because there was no sign of Pamela Anderson. I am pleasantly surprised; however, to see my all-time favorite lifeguard Nicole Eggert (aka Summer). She was great in Charles in Charge too, but I digress. OK, so Hobie's under the pier (OF COURSE) and we bring him safely home to his Dad, Michael Knight, no, Mitch.

Rather than the Baywatch theme, the music playing is the very familiar Shakira song, Hips Don't Lie. Interesting. As the characters begin to fade away, the sun shines in my face and I am home, in bed, safe and sound. A quick feel for bodily damage tells me that I am unscathed. So I get up to greet what will probably, in comparison, be a pretty dull Thursday...

Please don't forget that tomorrow is the feature "The Friday 5, 15 or 50...Depends on My Mood ", which is all the buzz with the kiddies nowadays! There may even be a little birthday something for our friend, Ethel...

Holiday in Spain

2006-05-03T08:28:00.000-04:00

"Got a bottle of tequila, and a bottle of gin"...

Easily one of the greatest songs ever. Not sure exactly what it's about, but I'm fairly certain it's not good. I take a lot of "holidays". Never been to Spain, but I can confirm that the singer's destination has also been mine many, many times. Last night was a a bit of a holiday. Shit, a new song on the "pod", Unwell - M20. Pretty soon they'll come to get me...

OK, enough fun. My Aunt Geraldine (Gerry for short) is taking her last samples of earth's air and I will miss her. Crap, new song - Home Sweet Home - the Crue. Hey, Aunt Ger, "just set me free" sounds good to me. Say hi to my Dad, your Dad, your Mom, etc. Safe trip...

Love,
Jeremiah (aka Jerry)

Isn't It Cold For May 2nd?

2006-05-02T08:39:00.000-04:00

A perpetual chill sucks...

I demand warm, or hot, weather NOW! Maybe living in California did thin my blood; however, I have been freezing for the past few weeks. I seem to recall the beginning of May being the "start" of summer. This year, I am disappointed...and cold.

Anyway, enough bitching, hand me the sun block (an SPF 8 is fine).

Oh, by the way, still playing good golf...

A Short Poem About Being Enamored

2006-05-01T11:19:00.000-04:00

Green Canvas

Why does she smile, why does she laugh?
Has she perfected such a craft?

Her eyes shine bright, so green and lucid.
Like September school, and she the new kid.

But what is this that makes her glow?
To cause her unbridled joy to show.

Oh look across the way, it dances.
Sunlight on green summer canvas…

"The" Shrine

2006-04-30T11:16:00.000-04:00

Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame, Cleveland...

30,000 Feet and Coming Down Again

2006-04-29T11:12:00.000-04:00

My view from an airplane landing in Bahamas...

The Friday 5, 15 or 50...Depends on My Mood

2006-04-28T09:29:00.000-04:00

Things that...

...I found at the top right of random right pages in the dictionary.

Potation (I kid you not)
Granddame *
Amass
Tumult
Nonrestrictive
Incorruptible
Cross fire
Meiosis *
Unseasonably
Dial
Scream
Yule log
Auricular
Muskellunge *
Confided

I didn’t know the ones with an asterisk (damnit!).

Stuff

2006-04-27T08:29:00.000-04:00

A language all their own...

As I further contemplate the events happening in my best friend's life right now - moving, new job, new imbibing philosophy, etc. - I cannot help but get sidetracked once in awhile by the inane. Specifically, this morning, I was thinking about all the words and phrases we use that mean either nothing to anyone else, or some meaning altogether different. I thought I would share some for old time sake. Sorry, no definitions!

Man
Calig
Belkin
BL
Saturn
Supp
The Lous
Spidey
Dice
Deuce
Baseball Cap
Speedy the Pancake Maker
Speck
Beverly
Kenny Lee
Pard
Messy
Tiny
Beacon Boy
Michael's
Hate
John
Flower
Young C...
Edy
Tapes
Your Boy
Meat
Billy
The Cave
Bob Sarastien

I, literally, could go on for hours. Anyway, the man is moving on and I am sure that our vocabulary will continue to grow and grow...

Of Disasters, Natural and Otherwise

2006-04-26T08:52:00.000-04:00

Another anniversary...

I'm not sure why, but I have been very in tune to anniversaries of bad things lately. I remember Oklahoma City to the day and the most recent hit me on the subway yesterday. I was thinking of oil prices, energy costs and things related to that, and all of the sudden I remembered that Chernobyl happened in late April. "Could it be today?" I asked myself, because that would be weird. Turns out it was not yesterday, BUT 20 years TODAY. Really wacky.

So, while I'm here, some thoughts on this devastating disaster. The reactor explodes and sends radioactive fallout over a large part of the then Soviet Union - now Ukraine. I read a while back that people left their homes, possessions, pets and everything behind, hoping that they would one day be able to return to their lives. There is also apparently a kindergarten that is essentially "frozen in time". Dolls and toys left untouched for 20 years. No, people were not allowed back to towns like Pripyat, where many Chernobyl workers lived. It is a widely held belief that those type of towns will not be inhabitable for centuries. Centuries...

Two thoughts enter my mind now. First, as devastating and tragic as Katrina was here in the US, the area is not contaminated. It will take a great deal of time and money to bring it back to life, but this is America, the land of the impossible dream. A levee system like the one in Holland and we're set. I firmly believe that there will be a full population in that area long before the end of even this century.

Second, we need to explore all alternative energy sources. Make no mistake, the earth will run dry of oil one day. I am really not sure where I stand on the whole nuclear energy debate, but if we are smart enough to split an atom and contain the massive energy, we should be able to make it safe enough so that Chernobyl did not happen in vain.

Despair Meets Hope

2006-04-25T09:38:00.000-04:00

Written in support of a friend...

Sitting in silence, thoughts they swirl
Can she retrieve that happy girl?

Her life is dancing, fast and reckless
Has she become so truly feckless?

Too many questions invade sore mind
Her left arm given for one true sign

This time it brings pain, and with it fear
That life will never again be clear

But overcome this moment for sure
By closing one, she opens new doors

Her courage surely shields her heart
Oh please tomorrow, a brand new start

Good luck, young lass, your journey long
In days come soon, in your heart songs…

What a Kid

2006-04-24T20:28:00.000-04:00

She is an angel, to be sure...

I had my daughter this weekend and I feel like the luckiest man in the world. She is so beautiful and intelligent, it makes me sure there is a supreme being. She received High Honors in school for the first time...all As and A+s.

I will miss her this week, but she is coming over for a hamburger on Wednesday night. Man, have I got it all or what?!

The Gateway

2006-04-23T20:14:00.000-04:00

The St. Louis Arch from my hotel room last year [August 2005]...

We All Have Our Crosses to Bear

2006-04-22T07:45:00.000-04:00

Largest cross in America; just outside Amarillo, Texas on Route 40...

The Friday 5, 15 or 50...Depends on My Mood

2006-04-21T08:56:00.000-04:00

Things that...

...I find extremely sexy in a woman! The order is, of course, as random as my thoughts.

Thong underwear peaking from jeans

Silver jewelry; especially, rings on girls thumbs, toe rings, anklets, thick bangles and chokers

High heels

Pigtails

Taking naughty photos

Small, wire-rimmed glasses

Black boots with laces and/or buckles

Belly rings

Intelligence

Lipstick

Drinking my beer

Well-placed, interesting tattoos

Nails in my back

Wearing my shirts

Understanding my Playboy subscription

Not needing me

Needing me

Old-school hair bands

Bikinis

Body surfing in said bikini

Skirts

Dirty talk in bed

A tan

Any knowledge of Star Trek

Experimental cooking

Leaving me alone

Smothering me

Invitations to shower

Good grammar

A twin sister

Oral proficiency (yes, that’s right)

Singing my favorite song

Driving me home

Shooting pool

Making me laugh, gutturally

Knowing the capitol cities of the United States

A gentle erotic rub at a formal dinner

Wet T-shirt contests

Karaoke

Daily use of engagement rings

A poem for me

Impeccable overall grooming

Sinister planning

Eating raw fish

Ability to throw a Whiffle® ball correctly

Real smiles

Finding my money

Digging the Yankees

A sincere desire for more

My girlfriend, Karen Lyn

Objects in the Rear View Mirror

2006-04-20T08:42:00.000-04:00

I will miss these days...

Did you ever have one of those moments when you just know you're at the end of something really significant? In life, I think it happens a couple of times and when it occurs, you find yourself temporarily below the bottom of the abyss. For me personally, I remember a few very well.

First was my graduation from grammar school. It wasn't really the school part as much as the athletic part. We were a very successful basketball team. Our final year we had a record of 39-1 (in grammar school)! I feared moving to the next level and not being the god I had become.

The second was high school. Here again, I wasn't going to miss school, but I was (for the first time in my life, literally) going to be away from my very best friends. These people knew where all the warts were and loved me anyway. I feared the real world contained no such characters.

The last one I'll bore you with is a job I had. It was with a company named Reliance. I met some of the greatest people there. We were almost like a family. Even though the company went bust and staying would have been career suicide, it was still tough to walk out that door and leave that group forever. Turns out that I see some of them to this day, but as I feared, it's not the same.

Well, yesterday was the newest in a long line of those moments. As I sat with my best friend, something in my mind clicked and I thought, "suddenly, it's real." My best friend is moving on. This is a good thing, and I am very happy for, and proud of, him. I am certain he is doing the right thing and that the success that awaits him is limitless. My feelings are strange on many levels. First, for some reason I am having a harder time with this than when I moved 3,000 miles away to California. Then, I somehow knew we would always be the same, this time, not so much. As much as I hate to admit it, I think it has something to do with my buddy's other big decision to scale back on his alcohol consumption. That was always our strongest bond. Sure, we had music and golf and the beach and shows like the West Wing, but those were always shared with some very impressive drinking by us both. Again, I think he is making the right decision and I will support it as best I can, but I cannot help feeling that the end of something big is near.

I love you man, but I fucking hate ends...

Who knows, maybe they are "closer than they are".

A Sad Reminder

2006-04-19T07:52:00.000-04:00

Terror has many, many faces...

Today is the 11th anniversary of the Oklahoma City bombing. Last year, I traveled to the site and visited the memorial. I was truly touched by how well it was done, and how at peace the grounds made me feel. My hope is that it has the same affect on the families of the victims.

Above is a picture I took that day. This message was written by searchers and rescuers the day of the blast. I thought it said it all.

William Jefferson Clinton offered these words of comfort in a speech just four days after the tragedy: "But for so many of you they were also neighbors and friends. You saw them at church or the PTA meetings, at the civic clubs, at the ball park. You know them in ways that all the rest of America could not. And to all the members of the families here present who have suffered loss, though we share your grief, your pain is unimaginable, and we know that. We cannot undo it. That is God's work."

Amen, Bill. Amen...

http://www.oklahomacitynationalmemorial.org/

A Place to Catch a Sunrise or Sunset

2006-04-18T08:45:00.000-04:00

A deck, a comfy chair and a beer...

Living near the water is my favorite thing. My current abode has a deck on the second floor that overlooks the water. Last night I purchased the perfect deck furniture to be delivered next Monday. I cannot wait to relax in the warming spring and summer breezes, with friends and nice cocktail. I am also quite keen on sharing breakfast with my daughter at said location.

Perhaps when/if my camera gets fixed (don't ask) I'll share some pictures of the sun and water.

One last thing: change is a'coming to the White House. My guess is that it will be nearly huge...

Weekend Wrap-up

2006-04-17T12:53:00.000-04:00

A long couple of days...

I probably couldn't be much more tired than I am right now. It feels like I got hit by a truck, got back up, and then a train ran me over. Let's play weekend wrap-up in an attempt to see where all this pain is from.

OK, weekend started for me on Thursday night. Got home from work, packed and went to my girlfriend's parents house. Her brother was coming home from S. Carolina for the weekend, so we wanted to get together. Turns out that I played golf on Friday, but I'll get to that later. Upon arrival, I was greeted by the sweet sight of a case of BLs. I immediately partook in several. Next thing I knew we were drunk-dialing pizza places at 11:00 with no luck. With a lack of pizza, we went to Plan B - which was the frozen appetizer route - pizza bagels and mozzarella sticks. A bunch more beers and to bed by 1:30 AM.

Our Friday tee-off time was 9:04 AM. Needed a shower bad, so I got up at 7:30. Not enough sleep for sure. The shower did help, however, and we were on our way. The course was in town, so we were there in 15 minutes. I was looking forward to a relaxing round of golf with my sooner-or-later-to-be brother-in-law, but that did not come to pass. That's right, I rode with the father. Don't get me wrong, I love the guy, but he is not the sanest golfer I know. Two bad shots in a row and his clubs become WMDs. You guessed it, two bad shots on 1 and 2. Next stop for the driver? Cart path. After a few holes he got stuff sorted out and actually played nice with everyone.

So as not to keep you in any further suspense, I will reveal my score now. Drum roll please, drum, drum, drum, drum, drum..90! That's right 90!! Ok, the course was not super long, and there was very little water, but come on, a 90!!! Things were working like they used to. Solid drives - 250 consistently. Tight irons, lots of greens in 2 or 3 shots. And a decent day with the wand. One of my favorite accomplishments was also achieved...one ball for the entire round. Moving on, I would only add that yes, there was some beer involved. 6 BLs for the round. That's actually the second round this year that I played to that number (of beers). I like it.

With our golfing done - and me victorious - we headed home for some lobster claws and BLs. For dinner, we made homemade pizza. It was great, except that aforementioned father sent two of the pies off the stone and into the back of the oven. Pies were salvageable, but the fire that ensued was interesting. No damage and dinner was complete. My girlfriend - Karen Lyn - and me went home that evening to see our really cool cat - Sushi. Karen had drank 2 bottle of wine during the dinner fiasco, so she was "tired" when we got home. After a nightcap, she called it a day. I did not. I stayed up to watch really stupid TV for two more hours with my friend BL. After the True Hollywood Story of Olivia Newton-John, I was done. Sleep came quickly and deeply.

Saturday was an adventure. It began innocently enough with KL and me packing our winter clothes and setting out our summer clothes. For KL, this was extremely enjoyable given that fact that she has essentially a brand new wardrobe. Anyway, we get that done and notice that is very nice weather. What should we do? OK, let's check out the webcam for the Tiki Bar - packed! (FYI, we are Platinum members at the Tiki) Let's roll. We get dressed and we're ordering beers by 2:30 PM, not bad. After some clams, pulled pork, a chicken wrap, some very interesting conversation, and a number of MLs, we were ready for home. The plan was to get a movie and some sub sandwiches for a quite night. Halfway home, the movie was out and a trip to an old favorite bar was in. More BLs. We did get the sandwiches, but halfway home decided pizza was another option. So there you have it, pizza and beer and finally, much later, bed.

Sunday was Easter. I was woken up the best way possible (wink, wink). After that and a shower we hit mass to say hi to God. We were picking up my daughter afterwards to hunt for Easter eggs and stuff. She looked so beautiful in her dress and sandals and shawl. I love her to pieces. Anyway, we had a great time for a few hours. We dropped her off at her grandma's house at 1:00 and hit the road to our first of two Easter visits. It was fun. Great food, cold MLs, lots of laughs and a few games of Washers. I'll explain Washers some other time. Ok, on the move again. At 5:30 we hit the road for our second visit. Once again, very fun. More good food, BLs and even a fire pit outside. After a few more hours of family bonding, it was time to head home. KL is pursuing her Masters and had a test to take (She got a 92!). Winded down with a few more BLs and some laundry. Then, with little fanfare, went to sleep.

There you have it, my weekend. For anyone that actually made it to the end of this post I say this: Get a life! Kidding. Well, at least now I know why I feel like a human punching bag today...

A Memory

2006-04-16T09:49:00.000-04:00

My daughter's first complete sentence EVER...

"Happy Easter, Daddy." It still gives me chills!

So anyway, "Happy Easter, World."

No Words Needed

2006-04-15T10:45:00.000-04:00

Catalina Island, California at day break...

Coolest Flowers Ever

2006-04-14T11:36:00.000-04:00

Catalina Island, California... Botanical gardens rock!

Dam, I'm Good

2006-04-13T09:18:00.000-04:00

This is Parker Dam in Lake Havasu, Arizona. I love dams...

What is going on?

2006-04-12T22:26:00.000-04:00

My first guest blogger is my girlfriend Karen Lyn. Her thoughts from this evening articulated below:

Hello everyone...

One thing I would like to say is; DON'T drink while watching American Idol. I know that you are thinking how pathetic, but please hear me out. My boyfriend's daughter, who is 9, LOVES American Idol and each week we have a huge discussion about who got kicked off and who should stay. So, needless to say, I was sucked in. But tonight, the families of these "stars" spoke so highly of them, it brought tears to my eyes. Granted I did drink some, but it was an exciting show to watch. Pick Pickler...so dorky. But she is really an unbelievable singer. She rocks - even though she is NOT the brightest bulb. Speaking of which....

Well I had a disruption because someone, not mentioning any names, wanted to critique my writing. By any means, I am not a great writer, nor will I ever be. I will always be the person who "has great ideas, but doesn't know how to express them". I guess I can deal with that. At least I have ideas, right?! Well where does this leave me now? I did enroll in an MBA program to further my education(better my writing skills)and to become a manager in the near future. I have improved my writing skills, but it still won't be good enough for others. That's probably why I prefer not to have a blog. I am so sick of people telling me that I have great ideas/suggestions, but if I could put them in writing with detail it would be even better. Well folks, that 's not going to happen because I am who I am. So, this could be my last blog. My advise: enjoy life to the fullest and make the best out of it no matter what, regardless if you can write or not!

I did not read Karen's post while she was composing it, and we made a deal that I would not edit it at all. My sincere hope is that my guest blogger will be back...

Death, and Life

2006-04-12T11:24:00.000-04:00

It truly is a circle...

So, I went to a funeral this morning. The person was close to me and I know the entire family very well. That said, I was able to relate to all the emotions of the funeral-going family; anger, loss, sadness, disbelief and - dare I say - relief. It is tough to admit the last one because we don't want to sound callous, but since I lost my own father to cancer in 1997, I guess I can speak with some degree of experience. I was actually relieved when my father died because he was finally out of pain. I'm sure that emotion is within each of those family members today, and I hope it does not make them feel less than human. I wish them all a spot of happiness today, and more in the weeks and months ahead.

As luck would have it, while walking to my car, I overhead a women say to a small child, "Happy Birthday". I smiled and realized that the circle of life is not a myth...it is as real as death, and even stronger.

Bad Dreams

2006-04-11T09:30:00.000-04:00

Sleeping is an adventure...

I have always had some degree of bad dreams. You know, the kind that wake you up frightened to be wherever you are? At this point in my life, I would actually welcome one of those dreams. Lately - the last 4 weeks or so - I have been dreaming from the time I close my blue eyes, until I rise from my bed at 6:00 AM with my new red eyes. And these are not just dreams of clouds and shit, these are the maniacal type with long lost loves, dead people, fire and monkeys.

It's interesting to think of this now, but the dreams really started when I went to see my physician. Now that may not seem like anything big, but I have not seen a doctor for 4 years. I guess maybe this turning 40 thing and coming to terms with my own mortality is weighing on me. Or, it could be the large Egg Drop & Won ton soup I ate at 11:00 PM.

Anyway, I'll keep you posted, and I'll even recount a dream or two if they are funky enough.

Of Boots and Pumps...

2006-04-10T17:59:00.000-04:00

My favorite conundrum...

Today is a nice day. The weather is in the 60s and the sun is shining. My dilemma is this:

I cannot decide which I prefer; women in boots, or women in high heels (AKA pumps). I have this argument in my head once in the fall - when the weather begins to get chilly and the girls begin to wear black boots on a consistent basis, and again in the spring - when the weather begins to get warmer and the girls begin to wear high heels again. Oh, the maddening incivility of it all.

OK, let's be honest, this is absolutely unsolvable. I can only be glad that I have this problem in the first place. Of to the streets of NYC for more torture!

Golf Thoughts

2006-04-09T06:08:00.000-04:00

So, I really love golf...

Since you don't know me yet, that may be news. Anyway, I used to play a lot of golf. Six or seven years ago I was pretty good; shooting in the low 90s consistently, and dropping into the 80s occasionally. Then came the drought. There were some years between then and now that I played a measly one time per year. Sorry, that just ain't right. So last year, while living in sunny California (oh, you didn't know that? OK, we'll get to that story later), I recommitted myself to the game. I even took my annual golfing trip to Myrtle Beach with JAH and played several times with my cronies from work. I began to play at a level that wasn't embarrassing. Then I moved back to New Jersey...

NJ is great, but it's not conducive to a year-round golf lifestyle (well with the snow and freezing cold and all). But if you start preparing in the late winter, you have 6 solid months of golf. That's what I did. I began swinging the clubs regularly and began a fairly intense stretching regimen. In February, I scored a trip to Florida and played two rounds of golf. Must say, I played pretty well. It's interesting how in golf, you can play well and still have a crappy score. I came back and continued the practicing. Waiting for the next round to see that Florida was no fluke...

Well, JAH and I got out last Friday. A perfect day! We hit balls for about 45 minutes and played as a twosome. In golf, playing as a twosome is really a treat, since the golf clubs (owners, not the sticks) would rather see 4 persons play together. It wasn't too crowded, so a twosome worked. Long story made short, I shot a 101. I had some pars and even two birdies putts - missed of course. Looks like I will be playing again Friday, then the week after. I'll post those scores and my thoughts of how I actually played.

I love golf. Oh, the Masters is a great tournament...Couples...

Stolen Stuff

2006-04-08T23:22:00.000-04:00

I stole this from Ethel, but I'm certain I changed all the answers...

I am: most decidedly not completely unhappy.
I miss: my dad.
I want: world peace (no, really).
I have: 2 tattoos.
I loathe: apathy.
I fear: bird flu (no, really).
I play: hard.
I hear: a lot of background noise.
I care: too little sometimes.
I smile: mostly to myself.
I wonder: constantly.
I poke: fun, when I can.
I love: Erin Victoria.
I mess: up my finances.
I ache: for complete happiness.
I think: therefore, I am.
I always: sing.
I am not: to be taken seriously.
I sing: off key.
I cry: hard, when I do.
I talk: about politics a lot.
I spill: all the spices when I cook.
I wish: wishes actually came true.
I keep: a note that says “I love you daddy” in my wallet.
I am not always: smart.
I can: drink beer like a beer-drinking fish.
I can’t: think of anything to type here.
I write: very well for a knuckle-head.
I win: less than I used to.
I lose: my temper too easily.
I smell: the beach when I am truly happy.
I confuse: further and farther.
I need: very little.
I should: be nice today.

goodnight, elizabeth...

An Old Poem

2006-04-07T09:40:00.000-04:00

Hello world!

I wish to join the ranks of all you clever Bloggers. I will attempt to maintain this space regularly and with the type of content that makes a visit worthwhile. I hope you like to read my stuff. But if not, I understand and wish you well.

For my first post, I have gone back to a poem that I wrote a few years ago. From time to time I'll post more poems, but this is surely not a poem-a-day site.

Anyway, awayyyyyy we go...

Fear...

In the long silence of the night,
I think of your body, mind and soul.

Can you ever know the extent of my want?
That you alone I long to hold?

When morning breaks, I lay alone.
Two souls apart the sunshine greets.

My utopia on the horizon,
Yet never does my desire meet.

The heart inside me feels pain today; we are separate,
Oh, to see your face.

There is happiness out there,
Please know that you've showed me the place.

This day too has ended, distance unbearable.
All my wealth to have you near.

It's not to be, and never will.
With but myself, I walk in fear...